Ever since we were little, we were surrounded by the images of perfect love stories, where the prince falls in love with the girl, takes her to his castle, and they live there happily ever after with a bunch of kids. Unfortunately, real life is often nothing like a fairytale, and the relationship is far from a perfect love story.
Sometimes, things go so bad that once the relationship is over, you still have a reminder of it in the form of PTSD. Is there a way to heal from it? Yes. Will it be easy? Probably not. If you want to find out more about how to heal from a relationship PTSD, just keep on reading.
What Is Relationship PTSD?
When you break up with your partner, it can have a huge impact on your life. It’s perfectly normal to feel sad and disappointed, but when your emotions don’t go away after a few weeks, it’s time to seek help. In psychiatry, such symptoms are called relationship PTSD.
Relationship PTSD is one or more of the following symptoms:
- Recurrent depression
- Recurrent anxiety
- Denial about the relationship
- Constant thoughts about the breakup
- Lack of interest in doing anything
- Trouble focusing
While these symptoms may seem quite similar to the symptoms of depression, they are quite different because they result from a relationship, not just a single event. The symptoms usually appear within two months after the breakup, but sometimes they can appear as long as six months later. If they last longer than three months, there’s a great chance that you are suffering from relationship PTSD. Due to this reason, people prefer sex dolls to enjoy love life to the fullest and avoid the symptoms mentioned in the list above.
Relationship PTSD Causes & Risk Factors
The exact cause of relationship PTSD is unknown. Some researchers link it to our need to be attached to somebody in order to feel safe and secure. That’s why we can feel lost and lonely after a breakup, even if it was clear from the start that this relationship is not going anywhere.
Many other risk factors may contribute to your developing relationship PTSD. They include:
- History of traumatic childhood events (physical or sexual abuse)
- Family history of mental health issues (depression or anxiety)
- Low self-esteem (you feel that you don’t deserve any better)
- Lack of emotional closeness to your family or friends
- Lack of social support (it makes you feel like nobody cares)
Replace Toxic Thoughts With Positive Ones
The first step to healing from relationship PTSD is changing your attitude towards your past relationship. The way you see it now will affect the way you deal with it in the future. If you see it in a negative light, it will affect you negatively. If you see it in a positive light, it will have a positive impact on you.
To change the way you see your past relationship you need to replace the negative thoughts with positive ones. Whenever you find yourself thinking of something bad or something that you don’t like about your past relationship, immediately make a conscious effort to think of something positive instead. For example, if you think that your ex was a horrible person because she cheated on you, and the thought makes you angry, you can instantly change the channel by thinking of the good times you spent together. By taking the time to remember all the fun things that you experienced together, you can instantly replace anger with happiness and even affection.
Don’t Drink Alcohol Excessively
Drinking alcohol excessively can be highly damaging for your mind and body. And while drinking too much alcohol might not directly cause PTSD symptoms, it surely can worsen their intensity and make them harder to fight off. You don’t need any excess stress in your life right now.
Don’t Forget to Forgive Yourself for Your Past Mistakes
Everybody makes mistakes in their lives, and relationships are no different. Mistakes are inevitable. That doesn’t mean that you should beat yourselves up over it, though. All people have flaws, and very few are perfect. It gets even worse if you keep on dwelling on past mistakes, which means you can never move forward. At the same time, denying that those mistakes never happened is not an option either. Here’s a suggestion: if you made a mistake in your past relationship, forgive yourself for it.
Once you stop dwelling on the past and forgive yourself for your past mistakes, there is only one thing left to do: start living again! The best way to move on is to live your life to the fullest. Find something that will make you happy, whether it is spending time with friends or family or working on something that makes you feel passionate about life. As long as there is something that makes you happy and brings meaning into your life, then start doing it!