It’s normal to not want to take the blame for something that you didn’t do, but what about people who refuse to take blame or ownership over everything – even when they’re at fault? If you’re in a relationship with someone like this, it can be exhausting when it comes to conflicts, disagreements, or trying to see eye-to-eye with your partner. This is often the result of what’s known as blame-shifting.
If you’re not sure if your partner does this, we’re here to help by offering some information on what blame-shifting is in a relationship. So take a break from researching expedited moving services to move out, and let’s see if your partner really is someone who blame shifts in your relationship.
One of the key components of blame-shifting is deflection. This is when your partner will turn the argument around on you. Instead of taking ownership of their behavior, they somehow make it to where their behavior was your fault. They’ll deviate by any means possible to not acknowledge what they’ve done.
People who are prone to blame-shifting during arguments have a major lack of self-accountability. This is detrimental to relationships as people need to acknowledge the role that they play in conflicts in order for any healthy resolution to transpire. Without taking accountability for one’s actions, they’ll never be able to learn and grow in a relationship creating a cycle of toxicity.
Plays the Victim
Blame-shifters love using role reversal in arguments. Instead of acknowledging how their actions caused their partner to feel, they’ll completely turn it around to where they’re the victims. This toxic behavior is prevalent in relationships with toxic and narcissistic partners.
A major part of the reason that people blame shift is that they often lack empathy. They’re unable to understand and feel the emotions of others, so they don’t accept them. They can only see arguments through their lens, and they’ll often feel like when someone expresses how they feel – it’s a personal attack on them. Without empathy, a relationship will never be able to flourish into a healthy and loving one.
Blame shifting isn’t typically a one-off occurrence. People who blame shift in arguments often repeat this no matter how big or small the situation is. Considering they don’t know how to approach conflict in a mature and healthy way, they’ll always turn to shift the blame to the other person. In their minds, it’s a way to protect themselves from feeling low self-worth.
If you’ve experienced blame shifting in arguments with someone, it’s likely that you were left feeling confused and conflicted. This is often because people who do this are trying to manipulate the conversation. They don’t want to be seen or view themselves in a negative light, so they’ll use manipulative tactics to deflect any perceived wrongdoing on their part.